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This poem was written when I was having a mild and good psychosis episode after smoking some bad weed that was not from the usual dealer. These are both feelings I got during the night I wrote this and other experiences during my 27 year battle with psychosis. I call it a good psychosis episode as it makes you more energetic, more creative and down for having fun though I just felt the creative part. I thought I’d do a poem as it will help me and other’s understand what it’s like to have psychosis and to share my own experience with it.

27 hours ago,

I never felt low,

All the things I see,

Oh the reality,

The worry that unravels,

Fears I would babble,

Going on a whim,

Forgive me father for I have sinned,

What will happen,

Will I get taken to Saturn,

Or will I go to Mar’s

Convicted behind bars,

Only time will tell,

That spiff made it hell,

Paranoid freak,

Feeling like celebrity chic,

Feeling on fire,

Are they really liars,

This is a risk,

Hand over fist,

As I inhale,

No voices will yell,

But feeling uneasy,

Now I feel weezy,

Taking deep breathes,

Laughing at best,

It’s really not bad,

But I feel sad,

Feeling alone,

Like I was a clone,

Feeling like these are my wishes,

Go swim with the fishes,

If you are against,

Pass me the restraints,

I’ll tie myself down,

Don’t bring me round,

I ain’t in the mood,

For those who are rude,

And have no understanding,

My love is disbanding,

But I got time,

For people who are fine,

Those people don’t judge,

Or hold a grudge,

I love people that care,

And to the ones who share,

Without being a prick,

Them people make me sick,

If you don’t like it go figure,

You can try to trigger,

But I’m strong in the mind,

Like a co-sign,

Feeling pathetic,

Dam those synthetics,

Cure and the cause,

There you should pause,

On the real tea,

Most people will see,

Though it’s subjective,

Like who gets elected,

Doing it for pay and fame,

Plus political gain,

At the very worse,

It turns into a curse,

And at the very best,

I’m creative and blessed,

Different on both sides,

Not sure about the lies,

Feel slightly nervous,

And feeling like I don’t hold a purpose,

In life structures form,

I need to be reborn,

I hope it don’t creep,

Tonight’s conversation was deep,

Hungry for fame,

That shit is lame,

The laughter aside,

My feelings I hide,

Or not no more,

Open every door,

Some people will judge,

Others would slyly nudge,

Oh look at him,

He’s so loony and grim,

But it’s okay,

For you I will pray,

You can’t see through,

You’re a ghost with no wooo,

You’re really not scary,

You’re innocent like Mary,

That’s the virgin one,

In case you are dumb,

I don’t feel loose,

But feel like a recluse,

That’s why I don’t rate

All you do is speculate,

That’s also why we don’t meet,

You need to take a seat,

And do some rewiring,

All that BS is tiring,

I don’t want to cause a gale,

And my train to derail,

I call it my happy train,

As I’m currently sane,

Though I got problems,

Like hearing them goblins,

They will twist the knife around,

So real and profound.

Author

ashygeorge96@gmail.com

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